Today, I entered my car after work and saw a book I began in September 2013 but have never finished. It’s a book about prayer. When I picked it up those months ago I was desperate to find direction for a particular situation in my life. I began reading it that weekend and knew what I was supposed to do – I needed to pray. Not just here and there – no God was asking me to petition before him the situation, to pray without ceasing, to be a prayer warrior on behalf of the situation and another person who desperately needed to know King Jesus.
And boy did I pray. I didn’t stop.
But then life got in the way. I prayed when I thought about it, but I did not make it a priority. As I slowly stopped praying for the situation, it slowly started falling apart. And now here I sit with having completely falling apart and my hard in a confused mess questioning what in the heck happened over the past few months.
But when I stepped in my car today, God smacked me in the face and I burst into tears as I realized the depths of my disobedience. He reminded of me of His request and showed me how I had failed to even come close to attempting to complete the task he gave me.
Oh, how often do things fall apart in our lives because of the disobedience we develop by simply getting too busy with our own priorities?
I’d like to think that maybe the situation would be different today had I been obedient. Then again, I like to think that my disobedience had nothing to do with the way things worked out. But frankly, I have no idea. All I can do is pray for redemption for the situation – whatever that may look like – and forgiveness for myself. And then pray, pray, fast, and pray for the situation today. Who knows what that means for the outcome of the situation – it seems to have already been decided.
But I serve a God who loves to redeem. He is the God of redemption, and I trust that His will prevails in all situations.
So here’s to obedience and God and I moving mountains.